Children grieve differently to adults, and that difference can be disorienting for the parents watching them. Your child might sob inconsolably one moment and ask to go outside and play the next. They might not cry at all, and instead start having meltdowns over seemingly unrelated things, like the wrong cup at breakfast. You might find yourself wondering whether they understand what's happened, whether they're coping “normally,” or whether you're somehow getting this wrong.
Some children won't go near a dog, even a small, friendly one trotting along on a lead across the road. Others panic at the sight of a wasp, dread a needle for weeks before a vaccination is even booked, or beg to skip swimming lessons because of the deep end. As a parent, it can be hard to know where to draw the line. Is this just a phase they'll grow out of? Are you protecting them by avoiding the trigger, or accidentally making things harder?
For many families, bedtime is one of the hardest parts of the day. Your child seems fine at dinner, calm during bath time, and then the moment the lights go off, something shifts. Suddenly there are ten reasons they can't settle: a noise they heard, a worry about tomorrow, a need for “just one more” hug, glass of water, or check of the wardrobe.
If this sounds familiar, you are definitely not alone, and your child isn't simply “being difficult.” For a lot of children, bedtime is when the day's worries finally catch up with them, and the quiet and stillness that are meant to invite sleep can instead invite anxious thoughts.
In this article, we'll look at what sleep anxiety actually is, how it shows up in children of different ages, why it tends to stick around once it starts, and what genuinely helps, both for children and the parents trying to support them through it.
You're holding your newborn at 2am and, out of nowhere, a thought flashes through your mind: what if I dropped her down the stairs? You're standing in the kitchen and catch sight of the knife block, and a thought arrives, unbidden: what if I picked one up and hurt someone? You're driving your best friend home and think, what if I swerved into oncoming traffic right now?
If thoughts like these have ever crossed your mind, you may have felt a jolt of horror, followed by a flood of questions. Does this mean something is wrong with me? Am I secretly capable of this? Should I be worried?
For most people, these thoughts pass in a second and are forgotten. But for some, they get stuck, looping over and over, demanding to be resolved. This is often what's known as Harm OCD, a form of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder where the mind fixates on the fear of causing harm to someone else, or sometimes to yourself. This article looks at what Harm OCD actually is, why it takes hold, and what genuinely helps.
You did well. By most measures, you did really well. But you can't quite let yourself feel it, because there's always something you could have done better. The presentation went smoothly — but that one stumble in the middle. The project was excellent — but it could have been more polished. The meal was delicious — but you overcooked the vegetables slightly.
“Walk with us to wellbeing.”
