The festive season is approaching, and if you've got children, there's a good chance the wish lists are already getting longer. Every trip to the shops seems to reveal something new they absolutely must have, and conversations about presents are becoming a regular feature at home.

For many families, this time of year brings celebrations, gift-giving and plenty of excitement. Whether you're celebrating Christmas, another cultural or religious occasion, or simply enjoying the summer holidays, it's a time when children's expectations can run particularly high.

As parents, we want our children to enjoy the excitement of special occasions, but we also want them to appreciate what they have, understand that they can't have everything, and show a little gratitude along the way. And let's face it, there's nothing quite like watching your child tear through a pile of presents, only to ask if there are any more, to make you wonder where you've gone wrong!

The good news is that wanting things, struggling to wait and feeling disappointed are all very normal parts of childhood. Gift-giving occasions just have a way of bringing them all to the surface.

The end of the year arrives in a rush. School concerts, breakup parties, end-of-term exhaustion, late nights, family gatherings and the countdown to Christmas, often all in the same fortnight. Children are excited, and they are also tired. Parents are trying to make it special, and they are also stretched thin.

It's no wonder so many families find that the most wonderful time of the year comes with more tears, tantrums and short tempers than expected. Understanding why this happens, and planning for it, can make the season feel calmer and more connected for everyone.

They pray, but the prayer never feels complete. They confess, but the confession doesn't bring peace. They try to think 'good' thoughts, but the 'bad' ones keep arriving, unbidden and horrifying. They fear they have sinned, or that they are sinful by nature, or that no amount of penance will be enough.

People often come to therapy feeling frustrated with themselves. 'I know it's irrational,' they say. 'I know logically that everything is fine. But I can't stop worrying.' And then they feel guilty for not being able to think their way out of it.

Children grieve differently to adults, and that difference can be disorienting for the parents watching them. Your child might sob inconsolably one moment and ask to go outside and play the next. They might not cry at all, and instead start having meltdowns over seemingly unrelated things, like the wrong cup at breakfast. You might find yourself wondering whether they understand what's happened, whether they're coping “normally,” or whether you're somehow getting this wrong.

Some children won't go near a dog, even a small, friendly one trotting along on a lead across the road. Others panic at the sight of a wasp, dread a needle for weeks before a vaccination is even booked, or beg to skip swimming lessons because of the deep end. As a parent, it can be hard to know where to draw the line. Is this just a phase they'll grow out of? Are you protecting them by avoiding the trigger, or accidentally making things harder?